Facebook newsfeed post by: Lucille Gull Millan

Lucille Gull Millan wrote:

If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair.



Fkall
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Sacred and Medicinal Cacti: Peyote, San Pedro and other Ethnopharma

http://www.cactus-mall.com/mss/old.html#34

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HOWL by Ginsberg

http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Ramble/howl_text.html

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Full text of "Peyote. An abridged compilation from the files of the Bureau of Indian affairs"

http://www.archive.org/stream/peyotebureau00washrich/peyotebureau00washrich_djvu.txt

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Dt

HI Papi!!!!! How r u!!! Great to hear from you! I am on a death trip. I hope i live through it. Lol. After that another one. I'm as free as a bird. Freebird. Silent birdsong i am. A dead man with a hummingbird spirit guide. I hunt peyote under the guise of urban archaeology. These senorita's down here are so beautiful. I get death checks. And wander. Many bright stars, like you!!, i have met on my journey through the western lands. I toss all drugs in a little baggie and crush em up. Must be 15 different types in my little snort sack!! Hunter s. Thompsan... I am making moments meaningful while i can. I got sunburned today!!! I love you Nate! All best to you!
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Laredo not Toledo

good god sunshine u r attractive hi my name is bill schafer, a jazz musician from st. louis on a wanderabout. would you like to have me as a guest as i am in laredo tx. i am destined for biloxi mississippi. i am looking on the ground for holy medicine. perhaps you could be a guide. i mean no harm as i am a buddhist christian zen taoist boddhissatva pascifist. a lover not a fighter though in these days as a dead buddha i fear nothing and speak my mind without filter. can u turn on a dead man? if so text,call, tempt me 999. all best to you and your loved ones.
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Blessed joe dames

Your prayer resounds deeply in my soul. Tears well up from your guidance and wisdom. I keep on keepin on. I unleashed my horns fury and ecstasy upon 6th street. It's allright. God damns me as it always has been and always will be. I entertain him with my fuckups and heretical audacity. It is indeed a closed circuit on a feedback loop of extreme danger and 666 so 777 that the 23 to the 32 does resolve through a lazy slack to 33. I welcome my death and am so sick that i have been praising Yaw spelled backwards Way for teaching extreme lessons through my beloved disease. Learning to love the atomic bomb. True my mind ticks bomblike but please read my mind brain surveillance technology. I play play but within my trash talk there is DEAD seriousness beyond REAL REAL. Joe you recommend me to remain the painful insignificant microquasar that i am. You my friend are a confirmed in buddha nature of a true QUASAR. Rich and invisible with mindfulness and kindness. I promise my death trip will not be an end. But as the schlemehl role of a Dead Buddha i hack through codecs and icenine crypts deciphering through dumb luck and holographic encryption codes coded upon the rewrites themselves. I am awful and terrible. I know. I mean no harm. But jah loves drama and i am eager to join Jesus in Hell in order to help souls escape the unjust rule of the almighty. Things change. Will the circle be unbroken?
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Contact 6th annual MgD conference

My name is bill, from stl. Worked as music therapist. I'm not as sharp as i use to be but i have done a significant amount of research; hacking information on the internet. I have many many theories. Theories that are not confirmed rather thoughts attempting to explain the inexplicable phenomena. I am familiar with both medical/scientific research along with anecdotyl evidence and the more paranoid conspiratol sci-fi data. We have no choice but to be open to all theory. I believe both me and you suffer from decreased impulse control along with impaired linguistic/speech abilities. i am an activist. I've suffered 6 years. I am divorced, not fit for duty, on long term disability, lost my house. I am a dead buddha. My klesha's are cruel teachers of pain and suffering devils whom become angels of liberation and disembodiment. it is the end of the line. I am like William Blake in the movie 'dead man' i am now to wander the western lands to find my assassin or an interesting death. Om mani padme hum. All best to you and your loved ones.
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Dhhjfd

A phd in suffering. Lol. The conference will key me in to the status of the 'unknown illness' BigPharma Psych Oligarchy decides that there is not enough human beings suffering from this condition, not enough $ to make research worth while, so it pays it no attention and continues to allow inhumane and unethical protocol to those that suffer. I mean come on....you go to a dermatologist to get help not to recieve a diagonosis of exclusion into a living hell that destroys ones status as a world citizen. I am not alone in this situation. Self diagnosis for me occured 4.5 years in. I never ever would want an illness to ruin my marriage, take my job from me, steal my house and sense of 'home' from me. My anger comes and goes. Most of all i am resigned. I may be a beach bum. I may expatriate to canada. I dont think i can live at mom and dads for too long. I am not suicidal then again i walk around without fear of death and often have disregard for my wellbeing. If yer sick everyday what matter? C'est la vie. My old self is almost a distant dream. These days i feel more like a test subject attempting fifth column. Sci-fi for sure. I am not psychotic but when reality becomes stranger than fiction one's creativity is a double edged knife. Love u bec. Wish me safety and luck in aquiring the neccesary information. xxx ooo
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Smt

You will find the (way it) hurts to love
Never cared and the world turned hearts to love
You will see, oh now, oh the way I do

You will wait
See me go
I don't care when your head turned all alone
You will wait when I turn my eyes around
Overhead when I hold you next to me
Overhead, to know, oh the way I see

Close my eyes
Feel me how
I don't know maybe you could not hurt me now
Here alone when I feel down too
Over there when I await true love for you
You can hide, oh no, oh the way I do
You will see, oh now, oh the way I do
Close my eyes
Feel me now
I don't know maybe you could not love me now
You will know, and her feet down to the ground
Over there, and I want true love to love
You can't hide, oh no, from the way I feel

Turn my head
Into sound
I don't know when I lay down on the ground
You will find the (way it) hurts to love
Never cared and the world turned hearts to love
You will see, oh now, oh the way I do

You will wait
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...

I worry bout myself too. I dont know. I have support here. I am fasting. Joe Dames has said that i can stay at his farm for as long as i like. Another Sax player stays there in his Trailor (kind of like grandpa's old one.) Perhaps this would be an interesting way of living. Very inexpensive and mobile.... I am about to play the sax and busk. Street Music is kind of like music therapy. I forget about myself and work in a higher purpose.
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Something in the air. God i have been at it for 5 hours. Extracting the tiny wire filaments along with unfortunate perfectly fine hair. I have a feeling of being possessed..movements not directed by my mind but the parasitical MgD etherical creature complex that has invaded my shoulders neck face scalp...digs so deep into the center of my back and then into the vertabrae spinal cord into the reptilain brain and into my limbic center finally prodding my frontal lobes attacking my soul..... As always help help help help..no one can help. Peoples kindness is appreciated but they read wikipedia and quickly agree that i'm crazy. Psychiatric..............fuc.....i'm so tired of fighting. Lord take me. ....... Please Lord Now.....now....ouch.

oh god are you in the second or third year?!?? The horror is so very real. And to be degraded by others telling u that the phenomena is 'all in your head' is enough to drive anyone crazy. I feel so bad. I believe i am entering the later or downward arc of the illness. Suicide, Psychosis, grandiosity, persecution complex, buddhism zen taoism helps make peace with the anger towards the almighty or matrix hologram. I speak to people often as a holy fool. A futurologist, a biblical prophet revealing the revelations. My life hangs precariously in the balance of some great unknown in the next few weeks. I have austin texas and then decisions need to be implimented or perhaps not. I have great friends i am reading 'the pale king' by david foster wallace. I pray that you maintain your sanity as you endure the inexplicable intolerable phenomena. Love one love. - william lincoln schafer, aka dj jazzresin.

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im hacked through n through. in fact i found the king hacker gray mauser's original wizardry four decryption cyphers somehow floating around the debris of my car. on the back of the piece of dotmatrix printed paper was a dungeons & dragons playa char sheet. evidently it held the details of a level six dead thief. when i get my matter frontal lobe right imma gonna make an mp3 playa full of exotic music for my sweetheart. the system infringes both gifting and ensnaring like pruett-igoe.
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Mov.

Edward Jones - John Mobius owens
Jiminey crkt - X Alex
W. Schafer - Fat Bill
- Jonesy
- Bella
- Wheels
- Mc Nails

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